You misunderstand me, let me explain.

I HATE IT when people say "Lynn you sound white" or "There you go acting white again" or "Stop that, you sound white". Not only is it annoying, its narrow minded, its a bit racist and stereotypical, and just plain ignorant. I get that from family members, close friends, and people that claim to know me. I gladly admit to not using EBONICS. Why would I when I say one thing ten different ways using ENGLISH! AND EVERYONE UNDERSTANDS!

I know how to string a sentence together without using Ebonics and apparently I'm white for doing that? How moronic? My superb use of the English language should be seen as evidence of my above average education and my robust knowledge of the English language not as a marker for race or background. To confuse the two would suggest that you require further education yourself. Black or White, excellent use of the English language should be something that we are to be proud of and not something for which we are to be ridiculed. One of my favorite authors is Jane Austen, not because of the content or the subject of her books, but her writings are so eloquent. The women in the novels can dismantle you using just their words and you'd never know it. Words are one of our greatest asset, not something that is relegated to just one race or class of people.

Because my skin is brown, this shouldn't automatically lead you to believe that Ebonics and me are friendly. Why is it difficult for some to reconcile brown girl with eloquent speech? One would think that a brown skinned girl, as myself with great use of the language should illicit some sort of pride, but instead some are a bit put off. "I'm not down" "I'm not hood". THANK GOD! Hood is not something I aspire to. When I lay awake at night I think of how I can earn money so that I can live a comfortable life, not in any manner does hood come into play.

I am also told that I am soft, because I smile too much, or can't cuss, or cant take a cuss. All these things are true, I deny nothing. I smile a lot, I try not to sometimes, but I cant help it. I have nothing to be upset about (except my lack of income). When I'm walking down the street,m people just start smiling at me; I assume it because they believe I'm smiling at them. In reality, I don't even know why I'm smiling, It just happens. I cant cuss, when I try it sounds like a nun trying to be vulgar; just doesn't sound right. I detest confrontation, so if you're cussing me, I'm going to listen and when you're done I'll walk away. I'll consider that our goodbye. I like to be positive, optimistic. My sister says I need to toughen up, and speak up. I speak up plenty. I, however, believe that when people are being abrasive they pull you in with them and that changes you; it sullies you a bit. If that makes me "white" or "soft" then so be.

I like me. I have never wanted to be anything other than me. I am secure in me and I know that whoever I am may not fit into an ideal box, but I am so happy for that. Pleasing people is not one of my talents. I have always done things differently. I walk differently, I dance differently, I cook differently, I clean differently, I see things differently and my family have always said that I was awkward. I have come to realise that I am not awkward at all, far from it. I just see a different route or plan and people take notice. Its not awkward, its just a difference, and I like different.

Embrace your differences, love your soft, white sides, and speak well...let them take notice.

Don't know about you, but I'm Loving Me!